Me and abel went to the pioner museum in flagstaff a few weeks ago
I been having so much fun. Me and abel went to flagstaff together it was beautiful. We had a nice drive it was peaceful. I needed that drive to clear my mind and get some thoughts together. It was great, it was life changing. During that drive I prayed hard. In fact I prayed the whole time. I got a stronger sense of clarity and my faith become stronger and more knowledable in fact of what is the next step for me and and my family. I leared alot about my thoughts and what upsets me, and I prayed to let that go. I dont worry about things anymore like I was because I dont need too, God has a plan for me. Ever since then I have noticed how people close to me have made comments trying to judge me or say things that could potential harm me emotionally. It doesnt work. I just ignore negavitty block it,and pray for the person that trys to steals my happiness one day they find the peace that I have cause the future has nothing but love and happiness and im thankful for it, thank you Jesus this single mom is floating on a cloud, Jesus has put his hands over me and I just let him guide the way.
Im okay today. This week really wasnt. School is back in session which means my work schedule is later, which means having to pick up my mom from work is more stressful than before and picking up my son. I am going through extreme exhaustion just trying to find A job that I can work in the day and have nights off. I got my substitute license which is cool, but there is not that many openings....I will keep trying. Using my degree would be okay if their would be anything in the criminal justice field open right now. Ughhh Then to top off everything I go through my brother decides to bring his kids to stay with him at my moms. It wouldnt be a big deal....if he supported himself....he doesnt so me and my mom not only have to support him and now his kids...He decided to go off on me for not leaving the door open so he can leave his kid hear alone after school causing me to go into extreme stress and go in the hospital to get help for the contractions. I just dont know what to do anymore have the time. Im just trying to take it one day at a time, and try to to look forward to the future I will make for me and my kids. I bought Madison I forgot to tell you guys im having a girl!! yeah!! Just that makes me sooo happy. I cant wait to see her, hold her...everything. I want to give my kids everything I can. Im not going to stop until I do. I cant give up. Not anymore.