RSV...and it can be fatal to newborns....then NICU...Thats all I been hearing since saturday evening that the doctor told me that at the phoenix childrens hospital...these acroyms...I would learn totally about in the next few days to come....
On Saturday...the 22nd of Jan...I found madison blue and trying to breath in the bassinett....I didnt panick...thats the worst I knew I could do... I started to pat her on the back and blew in her face...she madea a loud whistle sound and went limp but managed to start breathing and I watched her. I called her dad even though I been steering pretty clear of him because I was really worried...of course he didnt answer..and text me to put vicks on her chest..and that im overreacting...which I will talk about later...anyways...I called her pediatrican which I just went to take her too on friday because she appeared sick..and had a 99.1 fever...abels sick...and of course I got it too...we been coughing and had mucos...it didnt seem like flu but just a bug. Her doc said just keep watching her and doing the humidifer like Ibeen doing and cleaning out her nose. Well...he should have tested her for RSV what if I didnt find her not breathing what if feel asleep or something...the what ifs keep going through my head..but thankfully i found her. It was like it was meant to me because my wonderful best friend Robertta just had picked up abel so i could take care of madison and me she said you never rest...little did I know...I really would get no rest in the next couple of days. My mom had borrowed my car and about 15 minutes after I was watching my daughter sleep my mom came and we left immediatley to PCH.
I learned alot about life...in the last couple of days...I actually in the last couple of months have learned so much...my cousin got killed in november over a car...my brothers child hood friend got shot while he was sleeping in his house for no reason at all....my daughter got a cold that could be fatal for her....it made me stop and think HEY, pay attention more...calm down....I was not blaming myself...but I think the stress from work they want to lay me off and not give me my twelve week maternity leave they want me to go back asap...which is weird when I dont even work ten hours a week....Abel has been having some issues because of Madison which i know is normal...I think...the o ther day he slapped me hard when he was in the bath tub because I told him to get out.. I did start crying lol...becuase we had just ran home from the doctors office becuase I forget madisons formula...and managed to get abel to chase me, we only live 5 minutes away from the docs office..and I fed her and got him in the bath and was exhausted because of lack of sleep with him being sick, me being sick...and the new babys schedule...so when I started crying I yelled out leave me alone!!! My son looked at me and hugged me and said im sorry...mommy I said put your PJs on and go to bed..for the first time in his 3.5 years he did what I said...he has had more incidents but they are fading off I keep talking to him and tell him i love him and include him with his sister.
I think for most families maybe its easier in these transition times when a new sibling comes in because both parents can help each other when one feels hes not getting attention....Well its just mee...but im learning how to spread it out...Abel and Madison have been to daniels and he does help but its not a 24-7 for sure thing which is okay by me whatever helps.