Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Mom

The Author of this post is Kory Dotson The time had come and I was about to meet the new baby I had created nine months ago. Rushing to the hospital and giving birth was the biggest miracle I had ever witnessed. Holding my new 8lb7oz baby Jake, I couldn’t imagine leaving him in a few weeks to return back to a job I hated. As soon as we returned from the hospital my husband and I sat down to discuss money and My husband looked at me and said “I can support us off of just my income, and we may even save money because we will not be paying for childcare.These words coming out of his mouth were a blessing. My title went from newspaper editor to Mom. These words were only a blessing for the few months he was an infant as he got older I had a want to go back to work. I knew I was doing him a favor by being with him in these crucial times of development but there is only so many pieces of laundry to fold and dishes to watch. I then found a good break in my day was Direct Tv Hartford. I would flip on the T.V and get lost in another world.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

an End

Really there has to be a end to this roller coster I been riding...I want off...I want to be normal. I dont want no intruptions on the way. I need to be 100 perent only about my son...no man no problems, no mother around...just me and my kids...I can feel it so close its in my bones.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Feeling better

I felt like I was going crazy you can tell by my last post. Its called fear. Fear of the unknown. Nobody knows what will happen in life. Life is never perfect. No way no way no how. Its scary how life is but we deal dont we. When you go to the store and say be right back and what if you never make it back what happens. What happens if you get in an accident and lose your memory you cant talk you cant do anything the same way you used to....what happens.....YOU LIVE....thats what we have to do for Abel to show him its okay we are living and he can do anything. I drove to payson so pissed off becuase the doctor was so negative and cruel to us... I just kept driving I didnt know what else to do. ITs gONNA be okay I keep telling myself how much I cant be scared, my son is smart and WILL be okay. He is my baby boy...we will be okay no mattter. What GOd help us get through this he will be okay we will all be okay..I know it....GOd will handle this and I will give this all the GOd right now.>....SO bring on speech therapy....and OT therapy WE GOT THIS and kindergarten here were come.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Developmental Delayed....

What the FUCK!! really....my son....why is this happening to us!! I dont think so I refuse to take this I dont think and she said he has a two year old functioning level...Idk what else today but thats bullshit...all from showing him a few pics..... tommorow maybe ill right more.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

I love Zulily I get Maddys clothes their all the time

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Getting Real....

I feel like getting real today......Of course okay being a single mom hard....right...and not working and being a single mom right? Not working, being a single mom and dealing with the Department of Economic Security lol. I have been on the phone for 1.5 days trying to call 1.5 months ago they canceled my food stamps and almost my medical since I have a job at a temporary service as a sub teacher. Even though I havent worked in over 1.5 months going on two...larrys child support stopped...I think he changed his ss#. Grrrrrrr it will get better..........I mean you know what its not DES job to support my kids...NO WAY...but I will get on my feet with these kids if it kills me! Kids are supposed to be supported by their parents...Both physically mentally and spirtually. This is a call to the deadbeat men who make children and dont do any of the list I just mentioned. HOW DO YOU SLEEP AT NIGHT. YOu have babies in the world...they need u God didnt pic you to be their parent for nothing. In the end he wont think highly of you...its not about your ex.....love her like a friend....she loves and takes care of your babies....and cares for them like no other..... If one guy reads this and it helps maybe then at least It meant something.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Are you really a single Parent...???

I mean really are you are a REAL single Parent? I have heard guys especially Im a single parent my kids come over every other weekend.... thats not a single parent sorry. A single parent is someone who is really a single parent when the kids get sick we miss work we take care of them. They fall we pick them up.They need to eat we feed them. They cry we wipe their tears. We are the ones that have to tell them their dad isnt coming to get them. OR buy a present that says from Dad. Thats a real single parent. Not a weekend parent a fun parent who can map a couple days a month and make it look like they are so fun. Gabe said yesterday why isnt Abels Dad in his life and why isnt his dad spending time with him like this. Gabe is lucky I didnt beat him lol....FOr you do not know lil Gabe the road we have traveled with Abels dad and dont need to know but...as a person in the world reading this dont assume. IF a kids dad is not there...owell make it better for him by being there. By making him laugh so he can remember who was there. All the memories I do is create postive ones for my kids...larry is not positve and really either is daniel...but God chose them for their fathers and all I can do is raise my kids the best way I know how...and thats it. SO if your a singe dude...dating a girl with kids its all one. ALL one the kids are the girls only important thing you will always be last and if you dont like that....well you know whats next....... So enough of my venting!! ;-p VICTORY SPORTS MADD DOGS>.......Abels team WON 6-1
What a great win Abel did good until the end he got a lil confused and starting hitting everyone..for someone reason?? Poor baby...he did so good though!! We went to the house of healing in phoenix at hardcore christianty on 11th street and indian school and boy did god work miracles there!! We casted out the demons in all of us abel and me and my mom.and maddy.....and we will continue to cast them out because they are always trying to attack us. Go there it will change your life forever!! God is so good and so wonderful I had such a blessed easter watching abel eat all his chocolates and candies and maddy doing the same...we went to my friend Dianas(pinky) what a sweetheart she is we had a blast. SO the moral today is....Are you a real Single Parent....if not dont judge....THANK YOU the end.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

The Value of a Dollar ....

even more days go one Im learning the value of a dollar.I dont buy crazy expensive things but recently have thought closely about money more than ever lately. Larry was paying child support and now it stopped. ;-( For that month I felt a sigh of relief like its not only all me I have this, it was like a pretend husband getting a check in the mail. I dont know why I been thinking about getting stable more and money. Maybe because of lack of or maybe im tried of chasing it. Right dont we all chase it. We work to get it...ALL THE TIME. We need it so we can buy food, pay for a roof and clothes on our back. What if we didnt have to do that. What if life was like it was supposed to be like in heaven. I know im dreaming but its been making me think alot this idealism. For the last couple years I have been struggling struggling...to get this or that, put myself through college and came out strugling health wise, fiancially and sometimes I think mentally. STRESS kills people causes so many things. Im working hard on so many things so I can support my kids Ill never give up. Sometimes I look at couples with kids at the grocery store and think what is it like to have someone care for your kids as much as u do? I dont know maybe ill never know, I cant worry about it. Its been almost eight months since my brain surgery. I act like I didnt have brain surgery lol....
Im coaching abels soccer team the Madd Doggs. Im working when I want too heheh at teachers on call as a substitute I have taken a real focus on this baby fat....Im tired of it.........and am working out...lifting weights more.... Abels going to play baseball as well....in the Miracles League...for kids with special needs
Maddys 15 months got her first hair cut and can walk now for about a week!!! Im so proud of me and my kids.... We keep going like nothing no matter what happened to us. No matter what ails us no body would know nothing...and they dont need to know....all the worlds knows Is we love each other as a family and no one can take that away.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Learning

I wanna right so much but I dont have alot of time. Something came to me. Like a whisper. I need to hug my son everytime he hits me.He hits me because he wants to tell me something. God please help me help him...OR just go straight to him. His little heart is so beautiful and so full of love....Give him the gift of communication. I beg you. I dont care what it I will fight for him so he gets everything he needs
Life is Miracle and I feel so lucky to be here....No matter how bad it gets, No matter how scary it gets All my job is to make these two kids learn about love and life and I will do it. No matter what.

About Me

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Highly interested in the future of my two children...and creating postive memories for them is my goal. Im a single mother, a ASU graduate and a social worker...by accident.